Tis I the Fluff

So I've admitted defeat on the slimfast and gone back to weightwatchers. While I'm not up a huge amount, comparing my weight in Feb 07 to Feb 08? I'm up 1.5 stones. With a goal weight of 9.6 stone thats a grand total of 60 pounds which I need to lose. It's a bit mind boggling to me. So much weight. This is the biggest I've been. I'm an emotional eater. I feel therefore I eat. If I needed any proof of this when I got my exam results a few weeks ago within an hour I was in the Golden M ordering a meal plus several sides. I proceeded to inhale it and I mean inhale. Within 10 minutes all that food was gone and I felt sick. I still went up for icecream though. The whole meal took me maybe 25 minutes. I felt numb afterwards but happier then I had been before the food.

When I was a kid I never really thought about food. Sure I loved junk food, what kid dosen't. Food for me was just food, a method of refuelling and I would gobble my food down to get back to whatever I was doing. I was never a fussy eater either. I would pretty much eat what was put before me. If I didn't it would simply be served up at the next meal. My folks where the clean your plate kind but they also gave me appropriate portion sizes for my age. I'm trying to think at what point did my mindset change. I remember when I moved out myself and my roomates would have girlie nights in with pizza and icecream and chocolate to name but a few. I wonder the older we get, do we see food more as a treat then a means of refuelling. I remember an ad for icecream a few years back saying it was strictly for adults. This ad showed delicious chocolate swirls with real chocolate chunks all served up in delicious full fat chocolate icecream. As adults we have more money and no one to tell us no. Does this make us more likely to indulge ourselves? We have different pressures then kids. On our way home from a stressful day in work it feels like a treat/reward to stop off at a shop for a bottle of wine/chocolate/crisps. As kids after a stressful day at school it would be more likely I would be on my bike playing. Which is also a good way to work of stress.

So this weightloss thing is really a matter of re educating the mind? Sounds easier then it is. Not really sure where to start. I'm devising a game plan, the theme of which will be baby steps. Instead of thinking sweet jaysus I've 4 stone to lose I'm going to aim for five pounds initially. That can't be too hard surely. Also in defiance to the slightly brain washy marketing weightwatchers seem to be find of, I won't be buying any frozen readymeals. They are very depressing, tiny little meals,over sweetened, over salted, rather neon in colour and the meat and vegetables all have rather the same texture. On the excercise front I'm committing to going to curves four times this week. Which will entail cutting back on the social life but on the plus side saving money.

So in recap

V fat muriel.
Need to lose fat
5 pound incremental weight loss.
Am copping onto the fact it might be more then hunger making me eat
not eating frozen meals
excercising
becoming hermity

Good good. Plan of action prepared update in one week.

Week one Starting weight: 13.6 stone/190 pounds