Jan. 19th, 2009 10:09 pm
baasheep: (Default)
Last semester of college started tonight, the two subjects this term are introduction to business law and accounting 2. Law was really interesting, it was just an overview tonight (barristers v solicitors etc) but it kept my attention and I even managed to ask some semi relevant questions. Accounting I have always found difficult but the lecturer is loooovely, same guy we had last term for accounting 1. He explains the most basic obvious things without making you feel stupid. We are going to try covering the curriculum while bringing relevant balance sheets, analysis etc into it (in irish financial news one of our main banks has been taken over by the goverment after the ceo hid 100mil in loans which prompted the financial regulator to resign)to keep it interesting.

I am trying to think more long term on the college thing too as in do I want to go on and do the degree. I'm finding it tough at the moment only doing one evening a week but the degree is two evenings a week plus saturdays. For three to four years. On the plus side I'll probably have saved loads as I'll be too exhausted to have a social life. Sigh. Aside from the financial burden this degree will bring (work pay for the course only if I pass the exam and per semester so I have to pony up the money first which will mean taking out a loan)I'm not entirely sure I even want to stay in this line of work. I've been feeling pretty unsatisfied for a while now and while I don't dislike my job I am feeling very meh about it. However in this dwindling craptastic recession heading economy it seems like a really stupid idea to leave the job and the security it brings.

Sigh what to do what to do :/
baasheep: (Default)
Busy busy busy busy. I have one more trip to make tonight to a friends to drop off her xmas present, then I will be in hibernation house mode. Speaking of the house it desperately needs to be cleaned. In that annoying way that men of my dad's generation are it generally falls on me to do the brunt of the housework. I don't really mind, true enough its not on my scale of fun things to do but there is a certain sense of satisfaction that surveying all the clean space around me brings. However this cleaning lark dropped off since I started studying for my exams a few weeks ago and having social engagements every night since they ended (yes been out every night for two weeks, yes am exhausted, yes have reached end of sociable tether)means that I am rather horrified as I survey the piles of rubble and rubbish where there used to be clean floor. In fairness to him he cleaned the kitchen and his tv room and it looks great but he's been off work since last friday, it would have been nice if the cleaning extended into the hall or indeed the landing.

On top of this I couldn't find nice flowers for my Mam's grave so instead bought bunches of holly, leaf twiggy things with red berries and pussy willow in a moment of madness thinking "I can make a wreath/arrangement". Clearly I must have been on crack while thinking this, my fingers are so black they have almost fallen off and I have never done a flower arrangement in my life not to mention the whole lack of time thing. I bought some florists wire and this other gold wire stuff so hopefully I should be able to cobble something together that dosen't look like a deranged three year old did it. Hey does tinsel go funky outside? I was thinking of winding some tinsel around the dodgey bits (you know there will be dodgey bits) but am wondering if it will look ok when it rains?

Read )

Ok off to friends, pick up some redbull on the way home then attempt to build a wreath. You have no idea how tempting my bed is right now....
baasheep: (Default)
What a week, first off my laptop charger died and I only managed to get it replaced today. So I've been managing to keep up with my bloggy friends on my iphone but its not really conducive to typing out replies.

It's been a tough week ending up with me making a rather large fuck up in work, one of many over the past few weeks and openly sobbing at my desk. Yeah professional. Bosslady took me into another room and I confessed how hard I've been finding the work/college balance. Exams are next week. I finish work and go to the college library where I stay til 9pm. I get home at ten get dinner and go to bed at 11. Where I can't sleep. Because I'm running over all the stuff I didn't get to study. I'm exhausted but don't want to turn to sleeping pills as they zombify me. I forced myself to take time off and have been to the cinema and hanging with friends but at the back of my mind I feel incredibly guilty for not studying. Bosslady told me to focus on college and shes going to try and take some of my work off me. Again I feel guilty because she has her own jobs to be doing and now some of mine.

I think it's more then just exams though, the past few weeks I have been feeling down. Blue. Sad. Tears are a daily occurence. I don't like this supposedly festive season. I don't want to get my friends down because they do. Its easy to put a smiley face on when they are around. Its when I'm alone I just feel empty. Empty and stressed. So not really empty I guess.

In other news friendboy (he of the wanting a bootie call) called me this morning to let me know he's now seeing someone. It's only been 10 days but its "intense". Ummmm ok I'm happy for him but I don't really need to hear how wonderful she makes him feel, how she tells him he's so much better then her last bf and isn't it great they only live 5 minutes away from each other so they can see each other all the time! Nor do I need to see the rapturous bookface status updates either.

Sigh I'm one big ball of negative lately, hopefully when the exams are over normal services will be resumed.
baasheep: (Default)
Cuz I'm tired and have a cold that will not die I bring you a +/- post

+ Booked my STD test for Monday*
- It's €150!
+ If €150 buys me peace of mind its worth it I guess
- My local doc dosen't do STD tests
+ They will be offering free smear tests from the start of November though, yay!
- Am fairly sure I have a UTI
+ With the amount of cranberry juice I'm drinking I should get rid of my cold and UTI
- not really a fan of anything cranberry
+ Sip and See apologised for acting like a dick via email
+ I've deleted him from my IM list
- because it was bothering me that he was online and not IM'ing me
- still hurt
+ Am off this Friday and Monday
+ I plan on indulging in an early night on thursday and an early start on friday
+ Possibly taking in the art museum
+ More likely cleaning the house and my bedroom
+ Still I won't be in work!
- Yeah works not going too great at the moment
+ BFF is moving home, her BF starts work here in October
+ He's nice in small doses but a tad arrogant
- He dosen't know anyone here
- Therefore I am expecting to see him any time I invite her around
+ Not looking forward to her well meaning but pointed questions about my love life
- Am bored with my blah hairstyle
- Fringe is growing out and looks most odd
- Haven't seen any other hairstyle I like. Any hair ideas for those of us with baby fine flat hair? Not too short...
- Spent a small fortune on music
+ Love my new purchases

*It was surprisingly hard to find privacy during my day to day life to book this, after all it's not something you can do at your desk if you want to keep it private. Nor on the streets. They weren't open late so evening book when I was home was a no no. I solved this by going back to our old deserted spooky office building (card still works mwhaha)and booking there while trying not to trip over random debris. Fun times!
baasheep: (Default)

So looks like I might be out of a job. There was no warning bar a quick word from our boss that bad news was on the way before we all had to go into a meeting with the CEO. 4 jobs from our section have to go. Hopefully we will know who stays and who goes by the start of next week. I use hopefully in a sarcastic way. There was just so much tension in the office afterwards. Eugh. I am seriously fucked if I'm made redundant. Bascially for every year of service you are entitled to six weeks pay. Seeing as I've been there less then a year I get... oooh a whole 5 weeks pay or thereabouts. That combined with me having to work a back month when I started gives me two monthes to find a job before I have to start breaking into my meager savings. Fun times. They stressed that if people wanted to do voluntary redundancies they would take take on board and I did hear some of the old timers discussing it in a rather excited way. Some of them have been there for 20 years which is roughly two years redundancy which lets face it is pretty sweet. They also told us for the people who are made redundant they will do everything they can to help us find new jobs and also get professional cv type people in to make our cv look as good as possible.

I'm pissed that it has come to this but not angry. We all knew the northern rock and sub prime mortgage credit crunch would hit us sooner or later and even the politicans are starting to mutter about Ireland being on the brink of recession. I don't regret leaving my old job though I will be very sad if it turns out I am one of the ones who have to go. August 15th are when the redundancies come into effect.

Andria until I know wheter my job is safe I can't commit to crowfest. I am so sorry, I was really looking forward to meeting you, your family and all the other siters :(

Keeping on

Oct. 14th, 2007 11:59 am
baasheep: (Mam)
Thank you for your replies in the last post. That was a particularly bad day. I haven't had a chance to root out any professional types yet. Work has been kicking my ass. I love my new job but they don't seem to have a cluse about managing vacation time. If you have a team of six really only one person should be off at any one time. That way if someone rings in sick you still have adequate cover. Makes sense no? Instead they let two people have 2 weeks off at the same time. Then another is after breaking his leg and so will be out for six weeks. They can't ask the other two to cancel their hol because they had already booked flights etc. Nor for some reason do they want to get a temp. So that leaves a team of me whos been there for 7 weeks, S1 whos been there for 3 month and S2 who is the team leader. As S1 and myself are fairly new its falling to S2 to do all the other 2 jobs plus her own. I am doing the job of the guy who broke his leg and its kicking my ass big time. Average training on this job is six months. I'm doing it unsupervised after a week. I know I have some experiance in this but come on! Ok moan over :)

Seeing as I'm cheap and refuse to pay for an upgrade on lj I don't have access to the photo option. Instead I've downloaded the last photo of Mam as my user pic. It was taken about two weeks before she died. It was a gorgeous day the type of day once you are outside you could almost pretend you where in a park and not the hospital grounds. Mam was so happy that day, there was talk of her being discharged soon, she had her family around her and because it was so nice she was allowed out in the grounds until her next round of meds. Plus being outside she could smoke as much as she wanted :) Its obvious she's not well but she was in such good form that day wanting to know all the news of the neighbourhood. Makes me smile.
baasheep: (Default)
So my last day in work was very anti climatic. A little sad because I had been there five years and my present was a hundred euro gift voucher. I mean yay but at the same time I would have appreciated a little more thought and an actual present rather then the non effort that goes into a gift voucher. Its one of the top reasons I don't gift them to people unless they specifically ask for it. The speech tself was quite funny - if only watching my boss who hates me trying to find nice things to say. She fell back on the reliable thanking me for my years of service and saying I would be missed. I followed suit and thanked my co workers and said I would miss them. I thought I would feel a lot sadder then I do. I got a card which they plus all the dealers had signed which does mean more to me then a gift voucher. Roll on Monday! A new job and hopefully the start of good things. I worry if I have made the right move starting a new job. With all thats happened in the past few months I wonder if I shouldn't have waited a while. I read the lovely snickollets blog a few weeks back and this entry really struck a chord with me. She speaks of not making rash decisions after the death of a loved one. The 8th of this month marked the 16 week anniversay of Mams passing. Am I moving too quickly? I guess my question will be answered next week.

In other news I registered for college. Starting the 24th of september I will be studying for a diploma in business. Its a two year course and it involves one evening a week of classes (Monday) and I'd imagine a shit load of studying. I'm nervous. I haven't been in any sort of class based curriculum since 2002 and my experiances of Irelands educational system to date haven't been fantastic. It may be different though when its my own money on the line and studying as an adult with a definite goal in mind rather then a teenager in full time college with no idea what she wanted out of life. The way I'm trying to look at it is that a. it will look good on my cv and b. no matter what I want to do in life I probably will need some sort of business skills so this seems like a good all round course. It looks like the course will follow a standard college year too ie. terms in fall, winter and holiday in the summer. So hopefully next summer I will take a writing course for fun.

My next project is trying to lose some of this damn weight. I've been out for lunch and dinner every day this week and I can see my belly expanding before my eyes! I'm very unenthused about going back to weight watchers but I know it works so I'm just going to suck it up get on the scales and gasp in horror. Can anyone point me to some ww inspired receipes? I need some new receipes to add to my collection. Hopefully that will incentivise me!


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